According to the cliché, there are three types of fibs: lies, damned lies, and statistics. It is time to add a fourth category - polls that show public support for subsidizing professional hockey teams with taxpayer money.

The recent poll by the Province on this subject showed that 78% of respondents thought the Canucks should get some sort of government (read: taxpayer) financial assistance. The apologists for pumping taxpayer dollars into for-profit hockey immediately jumped on the poll as ‘proof' that Canadians are willing to deliver buckets of taxpayer cash to the Canucks. Anyone who believes that would buy a fast ferry from Glen Clark.

For starters, let's look at the poll more closely. That 50% of the respondents thought taxes should be reduced on the Canucks is hardly surprising. Most Canadians want their taxes reduced, not only for themselves, but everyone else and including hockey players. But the poll never asked whether Canadians would care to give the NHL tax breaks ahead of the rest of us, and of such a massive kind that the rest of us will never see. It's one thing to say "Sure - give the Canucks a tax break along with the rest of us," and quite another to assume that that person means they'll be happy with a meager income tax cut while the Canucks get a complete pass on their property or business taxes.

Nevertheless, the hockey apologists churn out the usual arguments: Other industries like film get generous taxpayer help so why shouldn't hockey? Sheila Copps throws lots of taxpayer cash at artists who hang dead bunnies, so hey - why shouldn't hockey get in on the taxpayer free-for-all?

Because as obscene as some of the dumb grants handed out by Ottawa are, and as silly as subsidizing Hollywood millionaires through excessive tax film credits is, that's no reason for taxpayers to jump off another bridge and bail out for-profit professional sports teams.

Canadian hockey teams are in trouble for several reasons: Over 400% increases in player salaries over eight years, massive American subsidies to their pro sports teams, and the low Canadian dollar.

If Canada's hockey teams truly want to solve their real problem, why don't they lobby politicians in both Canada and the U.S. to negotiate a no-subsidy policy for pro sports instead of lobbying for more subsidies at other taxpayers' expense? And in the meantime, spare us the crocodile tear guilt-trips. Hockey teams can heal themselves. The Canucks want $15 million so they can stay in Vancouver? Fine. Managers and players should cut their salaries in half to come up with it. After all, if the players and managers won't try and live on $650,000 instead of $1.3 million, why should the rest of us chip in? And as for the low Canadian dollar - that negatively affects almost every Canadian business. Why should hockey teams get special treatment?

One clear message from the poll is that 67% of the respondents are sympathetic to the argument about subsidizing NHL teams via lotteries. Presumably, and wrongly, those respondents bought into the blather that the NHL deserves a cut since some lotteries bet on NHL scores. If that's the logic, then presumably the NHL is also entitled to part of newspaper, TV and radio advertising revenues. After all, many Canadians buy newspapers and tune into their radio and TV for the sports coverage. Of course, the subsidy proponents have it precisely backward. Sports teams are the lucky recipients of plenty of free publicity due to the radio, TV, and paper coverage. Ditto for the free publicity given by lotteries. Ask any other business if they'd like that kind of free advertising.

And one last but often-overlooked point: the poor are more likely to play lotteries than the rich, so transferring money from them to for-profit businesses is the sorriest idea that hockey subsidy proponents have yet come up with. Of course, the public will see more such ideas and nonsensical polls as the hockey industry attempts to shift blame from themselves to everyone else. Hockey teams deserve tax relief, but only the same percentage of a break given to everyone else. And they can forget the subsidies.